I keep having ideas for posts right before I fall asleep or while I’m driving home from work. Those are not ideal times to write blog posts. I did find this gem online today and figured it would be a nice first post of 2016 until I can find time to write something longer. Happy New Year, everyone!
The following is an actual email exchange I had at work.
Coworker — Hi Team. How do I determine which [person on another team] will be working the following CR’s[…]?
Angela — Have you checked with [the other team]?
30 minutes later
Coworker — Yes, I did. Thanks Amanda.
Angela — *giant sigh*
Angela — I saved a piece of cake for you.
Brian — Oh.
Angela — You don’t want it?
Brian — What kind is it?
Angela — Slightly used. [holds out a slice of frostingless red velvet cake]
I wanna be a princess! I wanna be a princess! I wanna be a princess!
–sung by Dora repeatedly for 10 minutes straight, until…
*commotion, tears, and yelling*
I don’t wanna be a princess no more ’cause I keeped saying, ‘I wanna be a princess,’ and then I fell and busted my ear and need a bandaid now.
–Dora, our clumsy and logical lil girl
Minecraft — I think my butt is shrinking.
Me — Why do you say that?
Minecraft — Or maybe my legs are shrinking.
Ben — Why do you think your butt and legs are shrinking?
Minecraft — Because my pants are falling down.
Ben — Or you could be losing weight from playing football.
Minecraft — Yeah, I probably am shrinking from playing football.
Ben– [Angela’s] eaten more Asian food since she started dating me than she has in years.
Alan — Really?
Angela — Yeah, since my mom left. My other friends don’t want to eat it because they don’t know what it is.
Alan — Yeah, we eat some weird shit.
Angela — What’s green and white and purple and blue?
Minecraft — What?
Angela — Minecraft falling down the stairs.
Minecraft — [hysterical laughter] That really does happen.
HAPPY NEW YEAR!